Evolution vs Revolution

Evolution vs Revolution

For many of us, we face a choice, or, more likely many sets of choices where we have to decide how we're moving forward.  In each of those "big" decision points, you have a choice to make small, incremental changes (evolution) or scrap something/everything and start over (revolution).  Over the course of time, and the course of your family life, there are times for both and it takes discretion to pick the right strategy in the moment.  For most situations, evolution is probably what's needed, bumping forward in small steps from trial-and-error that get you closer to the desired end state.  If you picture the concept as a granite sculpture, evolution may look more like sandpaper while starting over with a new hunk of rock is more revolutionary.  

Explaining that to the kids at a regional airshow.

There's been talk for many years with clever examples of how small, incremental changes can make amazing, outsized differences.  There have been many stories of airplanes that get off by one degree and have to constantly keep making tiny corrections to arrive on time, and on target.  In today's era of high-end technology, it's less of a serious concern to safety.  However, not that long ago, WWII airplanes heading from the US to the European theater engaged in "deliberate offset."  That's because when they got all the way across the Atlantic and spotted land, they needed to know if they should turn left or right with precious little fuel margin on board to make a mistake.  

The Korean Air Flight 007 in 1983 made an unmitigated 1-degree error with fatal consequences after deviating into Soviet air space and getting shot down.  On the flip side, moving water from 211 degrees to 212, in large part, can be credited with the huge jump in human adaptation when our species mastered the power of steam engines.  In flight or any other example, the continuous and constant course corrections are small evolutionary tweaks, constant bumping of the controls to keep the plane on course to get to where it needs to go.  In your life, hopefully, you're making those small changes to your schedule, lifestyle, budget, or whatever else is important instead of getting to a point where you're so sick and tired...of being sick and tired...that revolution starts to look good.  

Sometimes revolution 
just looks pretty dang cool.

A few years ago, we were giving serious consideration to moving to another state that we enjoyed traveling to regularly.  In most ways, this would have been a revolution, a starting over with a new home, new community, new job, new church, a new network of connections, new friends, new everything.  There was some appeal to that...until we started thinking through what exactly that would look like in reality.  In this case, as we did some due diligence, it became clear that apples-to-apples, it'd cost us $12,000 a year, just in taxes, to make the swap.  There may have been some budget offsets in the cost of living or insurance, but just off the top, evolution began to look better.  Considering the high cost (in hours, not financial) of building new relationships, networks, and communities - evolution in our current location began to look much better.  The reality of each hour engaged in social networking would be an hour out of our precious discretionary bucket of family adventures.  

In another example, we did a job switch a few years ago where we moved from a situation that had evolved into a whole interconnected spiderweb of training, travel, volunteerism, and the day job all mixed together.  In trying to reset a bit, we switched to a new role, still in the same profession and town, but largely tossed the baby out with the bath water.  In hindsight, we landed on revolution but probably should have considered evolution...just staying at the original day job but pruning off all the extra that had made life stressful (which we did in the job change, anyway).  

Here goes the sled train 
full of toddlers. 

For others, it can be tempting in marriage to follow the trends of "when it gets hard, throw in the towel" or start a revolution, in other words.  Evolution in marriage probably takes the form of preventative maintenance (date nights, shared chores, budgeting, proactive counseling/therapy, limiting distractions, and so forth).  With kids and school, revolution may look like pulling them out and doing home school when you get frustrated.  Evolution may look more like joining the PTO, pouring into after-school programs, networking with school staff, etc.  For us, as we get into those early elementary school years, homeschooling was the glaring right answer for our family, in spite of, or perhaps in large part because of, the fact that my wife is a teacher who has a good view inside the school system.  On the flip side, if you're in an abusive relationship, it's probably time for revolution and starting over from scratch...even though, in the moment, that seems beyond impossible.  

Here goes a 1% set of 
cross-country skis through 
the neighborhood park.

As you can see, hopefully, we've shown that in times, both evolution and revolution are the right answers for your family.  The tricky part is determining which is which when we're staring emotion and frustration in the face or feeling stressed from where life has taken us...and anything feels better than where we are.  Next time you're facing a moment where you're not sure, grab some blank paper, and a pencil, and go for a walk with your spouse.  While you're walking, right down a paragraph that describes your current situation.  Jot down a few bullets of what is "so wrong" with the part of your life that you're in angst about.  Now, spend a minute brainstorming a few "1% changes" that might address those key issues.  Commit to doing those 1% things, to evolving that part of your life.  If they don't work, you can always start the revolt again later...but once you start the revolution, unringing that bell is often nearly impossible.  

In HAZMAT and the fire service, most pressurized vessels (think propane tanks) have what's called a pressure relief device (PRD).  These are often designed to rupture at a particular point to avoid an explosion when the tank is damaged or on fire.  From a technical perspective, the "frangible plug melts at a certain temperature" in order to serve as a trigger point to avoid catastrophic failure of the vessel.  Consider your 1% changes equivalent to pressure relief devices in your family life.  If you're feeling super stressed with finances and it's spilling over to your relationships, consider an evolution step - create a budget, read a finance book from the library, take a Ramsey Solutions Financial Peace Course, or whatever else.  Do some of those "small" things before you call up the lawyer, declare bankruptcy, sell your kidneys, and move to North Dakota to work on an oil drilling crew.  Evolution over revolution.  

In our moving example, one of our frustrations was the climate and weather that tends to keep us in more during the colder months of the year.  On the revolution, we could've packed the moving truck and headed for parts further south.  From an evolution point, some of the 1% changes we committed to were buying some extra warm winter gear, battery-powered hand warmers,  an electric 12-volt car blanket, and a couple thermos bottles to haul warm liquids.  We also found a few new winter hobbies and activities that made it more alluring to get out year-round.  Sure, those seem like an overly simple set of solutions, but it has made a difference over the past couple of winters.  Our antsiness subsided without the burdensome and costly reinventing ourselves on a beach in Florida. 

With you in the arena, from ours to yours...Happy Trails!

Call to Action: 

• Make a list of three areas of your life that you're "frustrated" with and one 1% change for each.
• 1 - ___________________
• 2 - ___________________
• 3 - ___________________
• Sit down with your family and talk about things that you'd like to see...before you get to the revolution level of grouchiness.
• Practice due diligence on thinking through the actions to get to the desired end state...and the unintended consequences of making a revolution.  
  
• Now go practice the pressure relief valve/1% improvement changes that help you evolve along the way to live your best life.  
• Discussion: Consider what you/your family could/would/should (level of commitment) and start/stop/sustain (action)

Further Reading, Motivation, and References:

- 212 Degree Motivational Video - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uRDNLTMaZqo
- Evolution - https://changinghighered.com/evolution-vs-revolution-do-you-know-the-difference/