The Upside of Marketing

The Upside of Marketing

No shortage of
temptations.

Marketing and advertising is a multi-ga-zillion-dollar proposition aimed at shaping our values, beliefs, and most importantly, our spending habits.  We are constantly bombarded with advertising in our daily lives.  Whether on the big screen, small screen, computer screen, phone screen, or the more traditional billboards, radio ads, etc., we're surrounded by advertising every day and everywhere.  Various studies put the number of ads that we see daily between 5,000 and 10,000...read that again...a day.  We hardly stand a chance, particularly with the increasingly targeted ads that tell or show us what we already want to hear.  

Bombardment 
is real.

Our Raising Adventure community is not spared from this assault as you can buy any matter (and price) of the newest fads or toys with the latest features to adventure.  Marketing will tell you that you can (and should) be driving the shiniest monster truck while wearing the most sci-fi new clothes, and carrying the ultralight equipment with space-age materials tucked into it.  This continual push to "more and better" is a dangerous, slippery slope that is often a bottomless pit that can consume our time, attention, and resources leaving us full of clutter.  

It's often not about
the fish...

I've always maintained that most fishing lures are made to catch fishermen as opposed to fish.  I'm not sure that every tackle store in America really needs 117 varieties and colors of plastic to outsmart a fish.  I'm also pretty sure that most "fishermen" spend more time in fishing stores on an annual basis than actually fishing.  Think back to yesteryear when your advertisements came perhaps annually in the Sears Roebuck catalog.  Now think beyond the constant bombardment of intentional advertising...how much do your "friends" market to you on social media?  How many times did you "just have to have" that new thing your social media audience shared?  How many times did you spend unintended money on the shiny new thing that you weren't expecting?  

Food's better
outdoors.

Over the past few years, as we've become increasingly screen-addicted, it comes at the cost of not getting outdoors.  Inherently, we're left wanting for an ingrained need or want to get outdoors.  To that end, we're seeing a huge pitch of nature as an advertising and marketing prop.  Think about the last round of commercials you saw - how many jeeps did you see climbing up a mountain or someone from the city wearing the newest fancy outdoor clothing.  Companies know that the outdoors sells. You should probably just experience the outdoors firsthand rather than vicariously through purchases.  

It doesn't take 
much to be a blast.

That same marketing funnels the masses away from some of our most beautiful places and creates solitude just off the beaten path.  So many people are pushed into a few sites, often within our state and national park systems.  Don't get me wrong, those places are incredible destinations, especially the National Parks (and we've been to almost all of them), they're just often, in a word, full. Similarly, on a good weather summer day, you can find a veritable conga line heading up the "name brand" 14er in the Colorado mountains.  On the flip side, you can likely have about any "12er" or "13er" without the name recognition quite literally to yourself.  

The same type of advertising and marketing that sells you "stuff," sells you ideas as well.  Do we lean into the marketing hype of the new rapper or the new pastor?  When was the last time you listened to K-Love on the radio vs the hip hop station...or the audiobook?  Have you tuned into Focus on the Family to be "advertised" to about being a follower of Christ and a better parent/spouse?  This isn't a holier than thou call to action, it's a call to introspection and to unpack the subtleties of what firehose you have pouring into your ears, eyes, and ultimately heart...and those of your spouse and children.  Turn on the TV for a round of ads...sex sells, booze sells, rest/laziness/comfort sells...are those the things in your heart of hearts you want more of...or are those the things that pull us into temptation.  

How can you 
say "no" to 
fireworks?

We can also be advertisers for our own ideas.  When was the last time you talked about how you raise your family, the positive parts, the sacrifices, the screen-free parts, and so forth?  When was the last time you told someone about your faith?  Your church?  Invited someone to a new sermon series?  We can advertise and market the ideals that we complain about our disappearing from our communities and homes.  We can lean into others who are a season behind us to help them get to where we are by selling the upside of why, what, and how we did what we did.  Similarly, we can seek out those in the season ahead of us to fill our minds with the "good stuff" of marketing...not the worldly trends on social media.  

The best things
are often free.

All of that to say, we have to have good "muscles" to push back on the onslaught of advertisements.  Consider taking a route to work with fewer billboards.  Consider switching to a radio station or podcast with fewer sales pitches.  Consider pushing mute and doing 20 push-ups when the ads come on the TV.  Consider asking out loud to your family "What are they trying to sell" when an ad comes on and talk about if you need/want that more than other items you could spend the same money on.  If we don't practice for ourselves and our future generations, particularly in the face of targeted ads on personal screens, we're pretty sunk on actually being able to live an intentional life.  

With you in the arena, from ours to yours...Happy Trails!

Call to Action: 

• Pick out three actions you're going to implement this week to push back on advertising (social media fast, new route, talking about it, etc)
• 1 - ___________________ 
• 2 - ___________________
• 3 - ___________________
• Discussion: Consider what you/your family could/would/should (level of commitment) and start/stop/sustain (action) with advertising (listing any "want" for a week before buying, etc). 

Further Reading, Motivation, and References:

- How many advertisements do we see

Good, Perfect, Better, Good Enough

 Good, Perfect, Better, Good Enough

Too often we get stuck in a "climb the ladder" mode where chasing a degree of "better" is a never-ending process.  In large part, chasing, growing, developing, climbing...seeking better isn't a bad thing.  Becoming a constant learner who gets better at their faith, their family, their hobbies, their relationships, and so forth over a lifetime...those are good things.  There is power in small, incremental growth steps that build and compound over decades.  I'd like to think I'm a better father now than when we first had our kids.  I'd also like to think I'm becoming a better father through study, practice, and prayer in the future.  

The dark side of "continuous improvement" comes when we let the constant climb be a bottomless pit or a topless mountain.  Think about it in terms of a grading rubric for a minute.  Let's use family finance as an example with a "perfect/A+/extra credit" being the pinnacle of everything exactly in working order.  Now determine what an A-, B, C, D, F look like in your family.  Perhaps a "good" grade or A is making your bills every month with some margin for future expenses down the road.  Maybe a "good enough" is a B which means all your bills are covered and you have the occasional splurges like a summer vacation or something.  

When we start talking about "what's gotta give" to get to the next/desired echelon in our example the conversation begins to become more honest.  "We can achieve ABC with the time/ energy /investment/ commitment we're willing to make as a family in this season of life."  If we make our polar star "better" instead of a defined end state, the constant hunt begins to run over our "what's gotta give."  Let's say, our example, our "what's gotta give" honest conversation about "good enough" is a job that doesn't require a ton of travel, home with the family, work within work hours, and so forth.  The intersection of peace of mind between income and outgo "how" conversations is the sweet spot we're seeking.  

The Bible talks about the "love of money" as the root of all evil.  In our above example, the always hungry "better" lies to us with the nicer car, nicer house, nicer clothes, nicer food, and nicer vacations are a must, a pre-req to happiness.  With each "nicer/better" ratchet upwards our baseline standard slowly adjusts.  I know when traveling as a single guy in the military, newly married hubby, and now years later...our standard of travel has changed.  Some of that is okay...some of that is great.  You probably shouldn't be sleeping in cars after driving all night with kids after driving back from some faraway adventure for your whole life.  That said, there's always a "better" in front of you...a nicer hotel, a 4-star instead of 3...then a 5 instead of 4...then a "black card elite instead of a 5" sort of ladder.  Finding your "spot" and sticking with it is key to happiness and contentment.  Look for the 1% small changes that bring a "luxury" to life...not the 10%/year/person/whim that becomes rapidly unsustainable.  

Shifting gears a little bit to other categories of our lives, hopefully, the clarity of "good enough" as an end zone comes into sharper focus.  When we got married, did any of our vows say "Until I find someone better?"  That'd be a pretty demoralizing entry point into a lifelong commitment...does anyone honestly wonder why our divorce rate is so high?  Imagine telling your child that you'd prefer the "better" version of themselves...e.g. some other kid.  Again, I'm not saying our calling as humans isn't to "iron sharpen iron" and make those around us better versions of themselves.  I am saying there is no mileage in the constant trade-up to a standard that shifts in the wind.  

Let's talk physical health for a minute...am I in better shape at 40 than 20?  No.  Am I in good enough shape at 40 to stay active with our kids, lead them on hikes, carry them occasionally when they need it, and so forth?  Yes.  Can I (we all) be in better physical shape?  Yes.  Should we quit our jobs, move to the gym, get an IV drip of pre-workout, and attempt to make our ears more muscular?  Probably not.  Better or perfect isn't the standard when we think about it in these terms...good enough is a more manageable, more balanced approach.  

To put it in another light, we've been at a career crossroads here recently...in doing some more work with contractors in our profession it's come to light that there is some serious money to be made in that space.  The professional growth and contributions are "shinier" over there.  The promotion potential is higher.  That all said, in one recent conversation with a contractor friend he said "The job posting says 75% travel...in reality it's probably closer to 90...just so you know."  Would going over to the "dark side" be "better" in some respects?  Probably.  Would it be better for our marriage?  No.  Would it be better for our family?  No.  Is my current job "good enough?"  Yes.  That doesn't mean I can't work each day to do better work, make our team better, and set an example of focus for others...within my 40 hours.  That "within" is the key word that helps us enforce the "good enough" in our lives.  

Shifting gears one more time to volunteerism and faith.  We've got family friends who are "those people" - the "same ten people" types that are volunteering for everything...they're Kiwanis members, board members at United Way, serve on multiple things at church, and so forth.  In the quiet conversations, the ones just past the public front they put up...they're exhausted and resentful that "they have to keep being those people."  Without the "good enough" finish line, any "good thing" that floated past them, despite being "one too many good things" ended up on their plate.  Over time, too many good things have diluted their ability to do well at any of the good things...and ultimately their quality of life.  Within what you're willing to give...be the best server/volunteer for the causes you're passionate about.  Don't let "better" or perfect be the enemy that slowly sinks your ship from a thousand cuts.  

Lastly, as we depart, we've talked about it before but the "perfect being the enemy of good" can lead to some ugly procrastination.  We've had those projects around the house that have been on the back burner waiting for "the" perfect time or "the" perfect set of circumstances to get started.  We recently put in a "good enough" light in the living room.  It'd been on the back burner, waiting for just the right conditions - finding the right light, the right price, the right weather to get into the attic, and so forth.  The "good enough" light has transformed our living room into "almost a whole new house" and we've found ourselves utilizing the space way more as a family.  In the projects of your life, don't let the false standard of perfection lock your parking brake from getting started...good enough is good enough.  

As we pump the brakes this week, hopefully, you've got some things to think about.  Hopefully, you're convinced that "good enough" is a good standard.  If you're not sure yet, go tell your spouse tonight that effective immediately you'll be in the market for a "better" or "perfect" version...word to the wise...maybe look for a perfect couch before you spring that little gem.  As we part, don't stop working on the "getting better" in your life...but with the important "within what I'm willing to give" lens of good enough.  Good luck!

With you in the arena, from ours to yours...Happy Trails!

Call to Action: 

• Pick out something that you're going to be "good enough" on and write out three descriptions of what that looks like - practical, tangible steps.  
• 1 - ___________________ 
• 2 - ___________________
• 3 - ___________________
• Discussion: Consider what you/your family could/would/should (level of commitment) and start/stop/sustain (action)

Further Reading, Motivation, and References:

- Why Good Enough is Good Enough

 

Lack of Imagination

Lack of Imagination

Many, perhaps most failures (when we don't find the somebody we're looking for) in Search and Rescue

Build the pillow fort.

(SAR) are brought on by a lack of imagination (after the failure of preparedness on the individual's part in the first place).  This often comes from a healthy dose of underestimation.  For example, on one call, looking for an elderly lady who had vanished without her purse, car keys, or phone, none of us "imagined" she could be under a bush in the backyard following a dropped hearing aid and a slip.  On another, a man froze because none of the local police personnel could imagine an 80-year-old with Alzheimer's climbing over a six-foot privacy fence and laying down 50 yards from the back door of the nursing home.  Our lack of imagination is often brought on by false or falsely imposed estimates of the realm of possibilities.  

The Pony Express
rides again.

When we think about the things we don't do in family life, it's often because our imagination has construed the consequences of the thing in an unrealistic manner.  For example, if you're contemplating moving across the country for a new life or a new job...fear and imagination will tell you that you'll never reinvent yourself, you'll never have a friend again, and so forth.  In this case, our imagination has failed us.  Will that scenario be challenging?  Yes.  Will it be difficult?  Yes.  Is it possible?  Certainly.  Will it be worth it?  Likely.  

Imagine what life was 
like for others...

When we think about the imagination and intestinal fortitude necessary for the pioneers of the mid 1800's to set forth west on a perilous journey to the west, our imagination can hardly conjure it up.  Most of us harken back to the 1990's video game when we think Oregon Trail...not the hardness of our yesteryear ancestors.  As we think about our moving example from above, think about the imagination it took to set across the prairies and mountains in a wagon as compared to calling U-Haul to go now.  You can research every facet of your new location no the internet, you can practically walk down your new street via Google Streets.  Imagine the imagination necessary in the Columbus days to set sail not entirely knowing you wouldn't sail off the edge.

Practice imagining...
it's a muscle that 
can grow.

When you think about the above examples, think about when was the last time you had an imagination-storm...not a "how to" brainstorm, but a "what to" conversation with yourself or your family.  What do you imagine the next season of life looking like?  If you're in the toddler stage - what does early elementary, junior high, high school, college, empty nester, retirement, grandparenting look like?  This isn't the "how to" of planning your great grandkids wedding attire but rather the rough sketch of the known next chapters ahead.  Using your imagination to shape the outline version of what's ahead allows you to later, better fill out the skeleton with the muscle and flesh of details in a brainstorm session.  This intentionality allows you to live your best life.  

Creative toys
help.

We fail to imagine that anything bad...or even sometimes good could happen to us.  I had a friend who was taken completely by surprise when his wife told him she was getting a divorce.  He'd never stopped to imagine that divorce could be in the realm of possibility.  Consequently, he'd never really put much intention into the prevention, maintenance, preparedness, etc. of the divorce.  To spell out the example a bit more, by not imagining that divorce was possible...there was a decided lack of things like marriage meetings, date nights, and so forth.  There was also a lack of prep like saving in joint and single accounts from a financial standpoint.  

Sleep in the back
yard or treehouse.

Lastly, for our next generation, the failure of imagination is impacting our small children.  Imaginative play is a huge part of healthy early childhood.  Increasingly, with screen "babysitters" and more increased organized activities, in large part, gone are the days of kids "just playing."  When we don't allow them to pretend they're cowboys, princesses, dragons, knights in shining armor we rob them of the practice to be able to use imagination down the road.  Similarly, when we swap out books that make you think creatively for screens that make you not blink...we further rob the kid's future selves from imagination muscles.  

All of this is to say that our imagination is a powerful tool in our human-ness.  As we grow older, we tend to leave the make-believe-friend behind which is probably good...but unfortunately, we often also leave behind our creativity and imagination.  By doing so, we tend to limit our thinking through a fear lens as opposed to the wider aperture that allows us to do great things.  It's important in your personal and family life that you allow yourself the time and space to imagine...what you want to be in the next season, who you want your kids to become, what adventures and lifestyle you want to lead.   

With you in the arena, from ours to yours...Happy Trails!

Call to Action: 

• Pick out a part of your life that you have a decided lack of imagination in...set aside some time to dream about what could be...then pick out a few action items that ooch you closer to the desired end state.  
• 1 - ___________________ 
• 2 - ___________________
• 3 - ___________________
• Discussion: Consider what you/your family could/would/should (level of commitment) and start/stop/sustain (action) in terms of imagination turned into action.  

Further Reading, Motivation, and References:

- Think about the pioneer lifestyle

- "Imagination is more important than knowledge." Albert Einstein

Uniformanism vs Catastrophism

Uniformanism vs Catastrophism

Waterfalls require
study.

Geology - the idea that something happens in a uniform manner over history...e.g. a trickle of water multiplied across a million years becomes a canyon.  On the other hand, the Missoula Lake Flood has evidence of a rapid, or catastrophic style input to create the same "canyon" effect.  When we look at the idea of something occurring slowly, almost habitually, or in a crashing moment of wild momentum, we can see how there are parallels to our family lives and our personal lives in general.  Think about what has shaped you over the years - habits like budgets, calendars, schedules, and so forth.  You may also say polarizing events like marriage and parenthood, or negative events like divorce or untimely death were defining moments.  

Nature is a good
study guide.

In biology, this general thought of rapid change or growth has been called "punctuated equilibrium" - the idea that we go along in status quo mode without much change...until something happens and we do.  Agencies or organizations evolve/adapt in this manner.  At the non-profit I worked at, we had a leader who was fond of the "prepping and leveraging" moments of punctuated equilibrium.  In an example at a major hurricane, we'd been toying around with drone technology but in the "peacetime," there was often too much red tape, bureaucracy, liability, complaint, concern, etc that would get in the way of meaningful progress.  In the lead-up, leaders had been prepping the integration of drone technology so when the major storm happened, they were able to leverage the technological benefits.  The equilibrium was punctuated.  

Grand Canyon
of the Yellowstone

Recently we had a person in our circle reveal she'd gotten divorced months before but they were still living
together because of financial limitations.  That got us talking...is "divorce" or whatever other "unhappy ending" a byproduct of uniformanism or catastrophism.  Did your marriage die all at once or a little bit at a time?  Did you "slip" into the affair down that slippery slope or was it a series of little grains of sand grating for seasons and years that finally swept you over the proverbial edge?  A fire chief I worked with who could probably be a stunt double for a standup comedian talked about his ex-wife and how it ultimately went to "how she chewed her blankety-blank cereal" as the final straw over the many years.

Acadia learning

Understanding the concept that both can end in the same awful outcome is a huge way to map out your guardrails when you understand the potential problems more fully.  If you subscribe to the theory of uniformanism, the idea of a dinner with someone of the opposite sex as a habit becomes more problematic.  When we invite others into our "intimate" spaces through personal conversation, compliments, "down time" like a long road trip, or breaking bread, we slide, uniformly closer to a potential precipice.  We might dive, catastrophically over said edge if we hit up the bar, get hammered, and flirt with the flirty girl.  

These rocks didn't "ooch"
their way here.

Similarly, with raising kids, the small basics of "blocking and tackling" add up over time with our children in shaping their way ahead.  For better or worse, there will also be those things they look back on as course-changing or catalysts to new paths.  Growing up, in junior high, I had the opportunity to help out an uncle on a very rural ranch.  The "have to be a man" path led to commercial farming during the summers and breaks of high school...which led to firefighting and the military.  The catastrophic change in pace started a new canyon that developed its own habitual path of action.  

Looking out over Zion.

Think back in your life with the moments that turned your course.  Also, think back about the general momentum of motion (habits) that have helped shape you and move you closer to where and who you are today.  Think about the events that can be looked back on in the coming year for your marriage and parenting that will be ones that you can say, "That changed our course."  Some in our life were small conversations (happy catastrophes, if you will) that led us to homeschool, pursuing Financial Independence/Retire Early (FIRE), and nurturing a robust travel bug (our 4-year-old hit all lower 48 states and most all of the National Parks...by 8 years old, they'd hit most of them multiple times).  

Don't skip skinny
dipping at Arches.

As close up, hopefully, you use the two pathways and philosophies to take advantage of, cultivate, and give yourself a catalyst to the positive change you desire.  No matter if you're "going fast" with a change or chipping away day in, day out, realize that both have a key place in your family lives.  One person in our circle, had habits that were carefully selected and ingrained...but when they had a stars-align-type chance to re-create life outside of a major metro into a rural environment, they jumped on it...then settled into new habits in the newly formed canyon.  Best of luck in finding your rhythm between the two pathways.    

With you in the arena, from ours to yours...Happy Trails!

Call to Action: 

• Pick out a "catastrophe" you could initiate that you've hoped for...list out three roadblocks that you need to overcome and three next-step actions you'll do this month to shake it up.  
• 1 - ___________________ 
• 2 - ___________________
• 3 - ___________________
• Discussion: Consider what you/your family could/would/should (level of commitment) and start/stop/sustain (action) in terms of new (or renewed) habits as well as the "big shift/new canyon" you want to form. 

Further Reading, Motivation, and References:

- Catastrophism Video on Youtube

- Punctuated Equilibrium definition