Locard's Theory

Locard's Theory

Locard's Theory of Transferrence is a cornerstone of forensic science and loosely states that anytime we're anywhere for some time, we transfer trace evidence to the new place in our wake (and take some stuff with us).  If you watch CSI or most other crime shows, you'll see the protagonist finding the "smoking gun" piece of trace evidence that links the dastardly villain to the vile deed in question...and they put a tidy bow on the whole thing within the hour (including time for commercials).  Like most things here at Family In The Arena, we explore topics that hopefully strengthen who you are as a family and get you generally closer to who you want to be as a family.  

Today we'll explore the principle of Locard, not from the transference of trace evidence within your home (although, if you got little boys, I'm sure you can attest to the accuracy of the literal theory that stuff gets brought in and dropped all over your home), but more metaphorically when it comes to the "softer" parts of our family and home life.  As we talk about our take of Locard's Theory, open your mind to think about what "trace evidence" gets dropped on you and what are you dropping around.  

The 5.0 is en route.

One of the other parallels I want to draw here is the "kick the dog" syndrome that we can too often haul home with us.  If our day was full of negative interactions where other people or our situation left trace evidence of grouchiness on us...chances are, we may shed off traces of that on those we love the most and deserve it the least.  I know I've been guilty of it too often that I'll let the weight of the day spill over on ways I'm not proud of manifested in sarcastic or snide remarks that are uncalled for at home.  It sounds silly, but on the way home, pull over in a parking lot on the route and stop, literally pull over, open the door, take all the baggage you picked up that day, and set it outside.  If it's still important in the morning, feel free to stop back by and pick it up...if it hasn't already blown away or you haven't forgotten about it.  

Sometimes all you leave is 
the word "snake" to
scare mom.

You've probably heard it before, but it's pretty true that we're an average of our immediate circle.  If you associate with drunkards at the bar, chances are, if you're not a drunkard at the bar already, you're well on your way.  It (and those in it) rub off on us and we take a piece of them with us.  For better or worse, good or bad...so choose carefully what circle(s) you're in.  If you're reading this, you've probably "made it" and this becomes more important for your kids coming up.  As they age into their teenage years and beyond, they'll start to look and act more like their circle.  This is important because in that transition from our nexus of influence (up through elementary school), we can help shape some of those interests that will translate into their chosen groups later on.  It's not categorical but if they grew up in the locker rooms of traveling hockey...they'll likely end up associating with different types of folks than if you had them in band practice or the peewee chess club.  

Doing some stress decon with a hike at
Joshua Tree National Park.

With HAZMAT, we take a proactive, intentional step to set up a decontamination station to help wash the "crap" off of us physically.  With critical incident stress from first responder-dom or military, it's important to "decon" our minds/spirit in healthy ways along the path.  Think about how you can "decon" the trace evidence that got picked up with you.  This could take the form of going out for a walk, taking a hike periodically, heading to a small group at church, going fishing, or whatever floats your proverbial boat and takes a weight off of your shoulders.  Doing this every so often helps empty out your stress bucket and keeps you moving forward. 

Before we depart, remember that much of what you leave behind ends up being contagious in a certain way.  You all know someone that is perpetually optimistic and when you're in their presence you feel more optimistic.  You probably also have some eternal little gray rain clouds like your own Eeyore Donkey in your circle that drains you when they come around.  Think about which one you are choosing to be for those around you...are you pumping people up or deflating them?  Just like you're picking up things from your interactions...you're also leaving them behind you that others pick up.   

Hopefully, this article gives you a pause to think about how you might be picking up some metaphorical mud on your shoes and where else you're leaving it.  Within the sections of your life, think carefully about what story the "trace evidence" you're leaving behind is telling those who stumble into it.  

With you in the arena, from ours to yours...Happy Trails!

Call to Action: 

• Make a list of three "trace evidence" items that you've noticed you pick up on a regular basis and bring home that take you further away from the desired end state you have for your family.
• 1 - ___________________
• 2 - ___________________
• 3 - ___________________
• Brainstorm on what to do to stop bringing home that baggage or life changes that help make you more "immune" to the "stickiness" of that particular trace evidence. 
• Teach your kids that what they say, do, and who they associate with matters...that it's contagious.  Try to hold each other accountable (and them call you out) when you're not aligned with who you're trying to become.  
• Discussion: Consider what you/your family could/would/should (level of commitment) and start/stop/sustain (action)

Further Reading, Motivation, and References:

- Locard's Theory explained by a forensic scientist - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZSPRK5s1pH0 

- Wikipedia on Contagious Behavior  - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Behavioral_contagion#:~:text=Behavioral%20contagion%20is%20a%20form,they%20have%20been%20exposed%20to.