The Power of Travel

 The Power of Travel

A house built
of bottles gave
lots of creative 
inspriation.

Travel is a pretty wonderful invention, or adventure, or whatever you want to call it.  It allows your family to explore other times, places, cultures, landscapes, and lifestyles.  Whether you're traveling across the street or around the world, travel allows you to right-size and ground-truth your space and size in the world.  In other words, when you get off the screens and go exploring, you realize that in many ways we're more alike than we are different.  You also realize that the differences are a spice of life...this is particularly true if you live in a cookie-cutter suburb or apartment building where everything is pretty similar.  

Beautiful places can bring 
the best in us.  

We've had the good fortune and blessing to spend quite a bit of time exploring around the US as a family.  Before children, my wife and I had made it to all of the lower 48 states and Hawaii.  By the time our youngest was two years old, we'd made it back to all of them at least once more.  Now that they're seven and eight, they haven't slowed down a bit, and we're writing this on a 10-day loop trip through the California coast and national parks.  Whatever the excuses are, they're probably not as valid as you think they are.  At no point in time as a human species, has travel been more convenient, affordable, or accessible.  When you think about our ancestors and the trouble and cost it would've taken to go "see the world" compared to $99 getaway flights from most major airports, we live in a blessed time. 

Building a castle on
the beach with washed
up bricks. 

When we have the chance to travel, we can realize that there are many great adventures to find both close to home and across the map.  Chances are, there are festivals, ethnic restaurants, historic markers...really whatever your passions are within a couple of hours' drive of where you live.  Within a three-day or so drive, chances are there are areas where people do life entirely differently from the way you do.  And a longer road trip or airplane flight, regions where life looks completely foreign.  By going to see some of these things, it helps you (and your kids) realize they're not the center of the universe.  It also helps them realize that they may be far more fortunate than they think they were before the trip.  

Seal watching in 
San Francisco.

Travel can also serve as a teaching point.  By doing research ahead of time, hitting key sites on the trip, and looking up things we visited on the trip, we can help our children learn research methods.  This before/during/after also helps us build anticipation and follow-up excitement so that the trip effectively continues far beyond the actual days on the road.  This teaching/learning not only helps our children, but also helps refresh topics we may have known once and learn new ones.  Travel is also great for facilitating learning conversations with our children.  Around every bend in the road are prompts for questions that can facilitate self-learning...and connection with your kids.  

Seeing a school bus
demolition derby race.

We've had several trips to ancient Native American sites up through the frontier of America.  When you realize those people were the same species as we modern people, it helps us understand that our capacity for hardship, hard work, and resilience is far greater than we often know.  On a recent stop in Death Valley, our quarter-mile hike full of "wow this is hot" type complaints was punctuated with a display about how, for five years, people filled wheelbarrows full of mud to boil out the borax, then 20 mule teams hauled the refined product more than a hundred miles to the railroad.  Talking through that really puts meal delivery and ridesharing in A/C in perspective.  

Becoming a 
miner in NV.

Travel also allows you to target the interests of your family.  This can be both seasonal and based on themes they're specifically interested in.  The seasonal aspect can include within the year - going to see the autumn colors in the mountains or the northeast...or it can be the "toddler-season" with kid's musuems and whatnot.  With road trips, you can also target the specific interests of your family.  One of our kids is pretty into space...we've detoured over the years to hit the Houston Space Center, Huntsville Space Center, Florida Space Coast, and other sites around the country to help keep the dream alive.  Using tools like Google My Maps to plot key points of interest, then chart a course maximizing your time between them have never been easier.  

Fishing in NE
and exploring
new species. 

As we wrap up the week - remember that travel is more affordable, accessible, and available than any time before in history.  It can be as challenging or costly as you want - 5 star resort hotel or camping along the way.  Also, remember the benefits of travel are pretty robust in both the short and long term.  We hope that you will embrace travel in the coming seasons of life.  When you get past the challenges or frustrations...and, as a person on an airplane told us back in the day, "pack an extra portion of patience" and hit the road.  

With you in the arena, from ours to yours...Happy Trails!

Call to Action: 

• Pick out a few get-started style trips that you can take in the next month.  They could be local or regional...but the point is to do something you wouldn't have otherwise done.  
• 1 - ___________________ 
• 2 - ___________________
• 3 - ___________________
• Discussion: Consider what you/your family could/would/should (level of commitment) and start/stop/sustain (action) in terms of traveling.  This is the time for conversation on what your style and future lifestyle of travel could/would/should look like.  

Further Reading, Motivation, and References:

- Google My Maps - https://mymaps.google.com/ 

- There are a ton of travel blogs out there - pick your favorites.  https://www.emilymkrause.com/ 

Disaster's Donut Hole

Disaster's Donut Hole

Understand what can hit you.

Following up from the last couple of weeks, we wanted to talk a little bit about the idea of the "donut hole of disaster," or where many folks unfortunately fall through in community-level disasters.  This post is a cautionary tale to make sure that you have a robust personal preparedness plan...that is adequately backstopped with appropriate insurance products.  When you have a "single family disaster" (home fire, heart attack, job loss, etc), the reliance for recovery is largely on you, your insurance company, and those in your immediate circle (church, relatives, friends, neighbors, etc).  Typically, the recovery from these sorts of incidents is fairly straightforward, particularly since you're not competing with other builders, lack of temporary housing, community-level clean-up, or much in the way of bureaucracy.  You utilize your insurance products and work through the steps of recovery.  

Practice ahead of
time.

In the mega disasters, there are typically many partners that show up in the "media interest phase" - FEMA, state agencies, local first responders, VOAD (Voluntary Organizations Active in Disasters - think faith-based and non-profit groups).  At some point, these people ride off into the sunset...and your recovery to a "new normal" continues.  In the early phases of the incident, your main focus is the immediate life safety items like Maslow's Hierarchy - connecting with loved ones, getting a roof over your head, addressing medical/food/water needs, and so forth.  In this phase, hopefully, you've got an emergency fund and/or a plan, e.g., "we'll drive to grandma's house and bring all of our food."  Also, in this phase, time is of the essence, and getting away from the hazard/avoiding it through evacuation is usually the ideal move.  

Build a team that works
together.

Note: even if FEMA assistance arrives (which is no guarantee - there are a series of "if" gates that all have to swing in your/the disaster's favor), the assistance comes in the form of low-interest loans and limited financial assistance.  Additionally, if you're un-(or under) insured and do have a catastrophic loss...you still owe your mortgage.  In many cases, your insurance payoff makes the bank "whole," not necessarily buys you a new house.  It's also important to remember that with housing appreciation, you can fairly quickly and easily get behind and become "under" insured.  It's important to periodically check back in with your insurance company to ensure your coverage matches your home replacement cost.  Lastly, there are disasters that are often not included in your insurance coverage - the main ones are flood, earthquake, and terrorism.  This means you need a separate, specific rider on your policy.  

Have a backup plan.

As you're thinking through the disasters that could hit your community, it's important to pick a solid insurance company.  There are horror stories in disaster recovery of a deep bureaucracy and a ton of finger-pointing in a mess of resources that you have to navigate.  In an ideal situation, you'll have an insurance company that is responsive and coverage that not only helps with your rebuild...but also your living situation (e.g., hotels, rental, etc) while you're rebuilding.  For many large-scale disasters...plan on months (or even years) before your house is put back.  This means that you need to have thought through what you'll do if the "big show" becomes a home game...before you're on the proverbial field.  

Make the most of the 
crisis situation

In many of the big disaster situations in recent years (Marshal Fire, Paradise Fire, Lahaina Fire, Malibu Fire(s)), the competition between builders, permitting processes, wide-scale clean up, and other factors have significantly slowed down the recovery and rebuild processes.  The families involved still have to think through things like where they work, where their kids go to school, what the community looks like, church, etc, when they may be displaced miles of commute from where life was pre-disaster.  Part of the solution to this problem...should you become impacted...is having a solid support structure and community that wraps around you and your loved ones.  

Keep your eye on 
the horizon.

If the disaster isn't so widespread as to necessitate FEMA assistance (think the small neighborhood flood or small tornado), the patchwork of state recovery programs is pretty varied.  Some states have an Individual Assistance (IA) type program, similar to FEMA.  Others (most others), there are well wishes, technical assistance, and not much else.  In those cases, the donut hole, you're left to your own experience in navigating the clean-up and recovery/rebuild processes.  There are documents like FEMA's EEFAK, the American Red Cross suite of products, and others that can help set you up for success before a disaster.  But...the main point...have adequate insurance that is from a company that isn't necessarily the cheapest...but has a reputation for leaning in to help out their customers.  And...build your community.  Lean into the neighborhood, volunteer at your church, and so forth, so that if and when a disaster strikes, you're not solo but rather can lean in when you (and those in your tribe) need it most.  As we depart, you're trying to avoid the "that sucks to be you...hope you had insurance" when disaster strikes.  Take time to plan ahead today. 

What are some donut holes that are in your family?  In life?  Places where rules let the middle fall through? 

With you in the arena, from ours to yours...Happy Trails!

Call to Action: 

• Pick out three things that you can do this week...and do them - call your insurance to ensure it's adequate, write out the phone numbers you'd need in an emergency, etc.  
• 1 - ___________________ 
• 2 - ___________________
• 3 - ___________________
• Discussion: Consider what you/your family could/would/should (level of commitment) and start/stop/sustain (action) in terms of your disaster preparedness...after you watch some of Peter's incredible content (below) and his whole channel in general, incredible storyteller and channel!

Further Reading, Motivation, and References:

- Peter Santenello - Hurricane Helene Recovery

- Peter Santenello - LA Fires

- Peter Santenello - Lahaina Fires

When It Goes Sideways - Part II

When It Goes Sideways...

Practice digging
for when you
need it.

This week, we'll continue on our journey about when it goes sideways, but move beyond the philosophical to the more practical aspects of getting prepared ahead of time and going through the situation with more grace, compassion, and resilience on the other side.  The ability to bounce back is a practiced art.  It combines some of the practical steps that we will talk about, coupled with the way of life, and more theoretical ideas from last week.  Good news is...like any muscle, over time, and with intention... you can build your resilience. 

Watch out for
the electric
fences.

From a more practical, nuts-and-bolts perspective, it's important to have adequate insurance and paperwork put together as a "parachute" or "fire shelter."  We're able to do life more fully when we know we've got the trampoline under the tightrope, so to speak.  So far as paperwork is concerned, it's important, no matter how young, healthy, your plans, and so forth, to have end-of-life documents in order.  A last will and testament, guardianship paperwork, living wills, legal/medical power of attorney, trust, and so forth.  It sounds silly but the tragedy of early and untimely death is a mountain to climb...it's worse if you didn't have paperwork put together ahead of time.  For most young folks, you can get by with a few of the above documents, often for free online.  As your life ages and your situation becomes more complicated, consider legal advice and additional forms.  

Sometimes healing
is around a 
campfire.

The other practical piece we were mentioning is insurance.  I don't know how many apartment fires I went to where, for the cost of a pizza a month, the folks did not have renters' insurance and now were facing the fact that all of their stuff was ruined...and no one was coming to help.  There are a variety of insurance products out there...and, like I've believed, fishing lures at the store are more for catching fishermen than fish (e.g. sales gimmicks), many insurance products are gimmicky.  That said, a few are absolutely critical in my experience, having spent nearly two decades responding to people's worst days.  Health insurance...for sure.  Car insurance...for sure - get choosy with deductibles, coverage amounts, and so forth...you can get upsold easily here.  Term life insurance...for sure - beyond that, watch out for gimmicky.  Others, like umbrella or identity theft, may be right for your situation, but choose carefully after some due diligence.  Many insurance folks will sell you what makes a commission...not what you necessarily need.  

Bring an umbrella...bit
enough to share if needed.

Emergency/rainy day/life happens fund - this is another of our practical steps, like a parachute that makes it easier to weather storms.   One common denominator to most disasters is that it has a financial cost to it...sometimes a big one.  I understand how hard life can be when you frequently have more money than month.  In those days or seasons, it's hard to think about the margin and peace of mind that comes with having a little money set aside.  Dave Ramsey's Baby Steps start with $1,000 starter fund and ultimately grow to 3-6 months of living expenses.  When you're facing a crisis, the last thing you want to worry about is if you have enough money in your savings account to help get through the immediate moments without having to think about it too much.  If you're struggling with finances, get in the habit of setting back a little bit until you can set back a lot.  

Sometimes...you just need
to wade in and wear it
dry later.  

In some cases, we can avoid or mitigate the consequences of a bad thing by getting out in front of it.  We know that many divorces are caused by financial issues.  We also know that many financial situations are compounded by the lack of a plan or budget.  Therefore, we can protect our marriage by having a monthly budget and financial conversations.  The this-then-that thinking can hopefully help us avoid the bad situation in its entirety.  If I don't eat a pack of cookies every day, my risk of a heart attack goes down.  Similarly, we can "mitigate" or reduce the consequences when something does happen.  By having life insurance, my untimely death (hopefully from the cookies), will be easier for my wife to deal with when she doesn't get the double whammy of me gone...and having to go back to work tomorrow to keep food on the table.  

Learning from your mistakes...
can help you not get lost...
or at least as lost next time.

The last of our practical steps are plans/checklists and After Action Review-Improvement Plans (AAR-IP).  Plans and checklists are forward-looking, while an AAR is looking backwards...with the associated IP part gets us back around the corner to looking ahead.  In a practical family example, let's say you have an unexpected job loss.  A checklist (likely can be found online for rip off and replicate) may include steps like cleaning out the office, updating the resume, applying for unemployment, poking network connections, cutting back the spending budget, and putting out job applications.  The "job loss checklist" can be as detailed or sparse as you like - knowing that it won't address every eventuality or be 100% applicable to the situation in the moment...but it will guide those initial actions when you're in the shock of the moment. 

Trial-and-error 
works...but you can 
learn from others, too.

Shifting gears to the AAR-IP component, it's important to spend some introspective time reflecting on the root causes of our crisis and what we'll do differently next time.  Say you go through a bankruptcy (worst case, so scale back your financial emergency to fit you and apply the principles to your situation), an AAR might include the things that led you to the situation...and what you'll do differently next time.  The reason we look carefully in hindsight at these is that no two situations are identical.  One bankruptcy might be brought on by swiping the credit card for far more than you can pay off every month...another might be from a medical emergency.  Those two situations obviously call for different ways forward to avoid the problem next time.  In one situation, we can change our habits, increase our income, and so forth.  On the other hand, we likely can't avoid the uninsured driver who ran the red light or the big "c-word" diagnosis that required treatment.  

Sometimes, we should 
learn from others...
other times...others 
can learn from us.

If you want to take the AAR-IP concept a step further, you can apply the principles in a conversation with your loved ones about a similar situation in someone else's life.  We recently had one of those "have everything put together" peer couples implode with him moving out, a very public speech at church, and ultimately a divorce...which required them to sell their home.  The very put-together persona shattered shockingly quickly (from the outside looking in) and rippled through their entire life/lifestyle.  In unpacking the situation a bit around our table, we were able to tease out some of the warning signs and slippery slopes that we could re-double down on in our lives to avoid more carefully moving forward.  This look at others can also hopefully help us be more empathetic, top-of-mind prayer requests for others, and build up a community that is struggling because we're looking for those who could use an arm around the shoulders.  

Do life with a tribe...
we were built to 
not run solo.

As we wrap up this part, one more tip would be to utilize the community.  This could be friends, relatives, church contacts, neighbors, co-workers, and others in your circle.  The idea that "you're doing life together" is an important practical step.  One of you struggling...the others bring meals, watch the kids, move the piano, and so forth.  With our modern busy schedules and service economy, rarely do we practice just leaning in with others...and letting them lean in with us.  It is hard to "turn on community" in a crisis if you haven't done the relationship-building work ahead of time, sometimes over years.  Invite people over for game night, host a BBQ, and say "yes" to the church volunteer commitment.  Be intentional and proactive about "putting capital in the relationship bank" so that if/when you or someone in the "tribe" needs it, you can make withdrawals.  

It sucks that bad things happen...for some, we can prevent them or lessen their consequences, for others, we can make it through as best as possible.  Hopefully, between the last two weeks, you've gotten some ideas on the theory and the "to-do" list for being ready before, during, and after the crisis.  As you go through life, keep your family close, build your community, have good insurance...and live your best life...ready to go over the speedbumps and past the hurdles.  

With you in the arena, from ours to yours...Happy Trails!

Call to Action: 

• Pick out three things you're going to check on or do this week - add/confirm insurance, study a bad situation, etc...and go take action.  
• 1 - ___________________ 
• 2 - ___________________
• 3 - ___________________
• Discussion: Consider what you/your family could/would/should (level of commitment) and start/stop/sustain (action) as it relates to being ready for a bad day.  

Further Reading, Motivation, and References:

- Teddy Roosevelt on The Strenuous Life