1-Second Rule
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| Practice doing hard things. |
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| Sometimes it's not a hard physical thing. |
In much the same way, when we stare at an eternity of death-do-us-part in marriage or a lifetime of raising kids from babies to adults...those are big things...or should be big-thing level commitments. That said, the way we win the marathon of these critical parts of life is through winning the 1-second moments... over and over. In raising kids, these may be the moments where you have to pick reading a book to the kids, or throwing a ball in the backyard, or signing up for Little League...instead of filling the moments with "your" stuff. It's the "we" over "me" moments that add up. Each of those 1-second battles that you win is a testament that your kids matter to you.
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| Sports help. |
Similarly, in marriage, the "we" more than "me" moments are critical. It may take a different flavor with having "peaceful" arguments where the goal is not "winning" the argument but rather win-win and what is best in the long term for the family as it relates to whatever issue that caused the argument in the first place. Each of those interactions - each "good morning" and "kiss good night" is a chance to win the 1-second moments. Good news is...they reset every day, and you can start winning tomorrow. Bad news - too many tomorrows add together until you end up with the battles becoming the lost war. On the other side of the coin...the 1-second wins add up just the same for a great, contented life.
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| Nature is great training. |
We can apply this to our financial or fitness life with the idea of diet, exercise, and budgeting. In those small moments when you're falling for the extra cookie or the impulse purchase, you've got to win more often than not. This isn't to say that you have to make every treat or splurge an adversarial "battle." We can make a budget - for our food, money, or schedule - and then eat/spend/do within our means. The 1-second battle becomes a problem when it starts "leading us into temptation"...and once we're slipping, we're sliding. I don't know how we can sit down...and a whole pan of brownies sometimes vanishes. Put guardrails in place around the places where you know you're most likely to struggle or trip.
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| Don't stop. |
For those struggling with mental health, depression, or addiction - oftentimes the difference between falling down and staying standing is the wins of the mini-moments. I had a friend on the fire department who was struggling...but managing. He was winning and stacking the moments day-by-day...until one day...he lost the ultimate 1-second battle. After a few too many drinks and a bad phone call with an ex-girlfriend and mother of their child, he made a permanent decision based on a series of temporary life circumstances. He lost the most important 1-second battle in the moment that mattered most. He's been gone more than ten years now. Every 1-second battle matters...every time.
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| Winning often comes with a great view. |
When it comes to faith, perhaps that's our most important 1-second set of battles we have to win. When we have moments of doubt...we have to win...every time. In survival, it's been said you can survive three weeks without food, three days without water, three minutes without oxygen...and three seconds without hope or faith. There's a reason survival experts put this at the top. Part of this (and all the categories) is to build up the bank account so that when the 1-second moments arrive, we're ready for them. In the faith realm - reading the Bible, attending church, making prayer part of the daily cadence. Those little proactive wins build up enough momentum to help you carry through the challenging times.
In our lives, we have many challenges that have many seconds that we have to win. Losing one second with snapping at a kid, your spouse, cheating, etc., happens. But, with time, patience, and a big why...it can happen less and less. Here's to you and yours...winning all of the 1-second battles in your pathway.
With you in the arena, from ours to yours...Happy Trails!
Call to Action:
- Pick out a couple of things in the coming week that are 1-second potential...and commit to winning them.
- 1 - ___________________
- 2 - ___________________
- 3 - ___________________
- Discussion: Consider what you/your family could/would/should (level of commitment) and start/stop/sustain (action) for supporting each other in the moments this week.
Further Reading, Motivation, and References:
- The 1-Second Decision, Talent vs. Genius, & More - Sahil Bloom




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